Love Doesn’t Hurt (Domestic Violence Awareness Week 2)

Since the month of October is Domestic Violence Awareness month, and it’s really important to me since it’s my sororities philanthropy, I have vowed to post about domestic violence once a week for the month of October here at College Lifestyles (TM). If you missed last weeks post, check it out here. Since that post was a lot of facts, this week I wanted to focus on teen violence. As I mentioned last week, the statistics are scary how common domestic violence is in teens.

One of my best friends in high school was in an abusive relationship, and I witnessed it, as did several of our other friends. I had no idea what to do, and imagine that most high school students today would share my confusion. That’s why it’s so important to spread the word that there is something you can do to help, and it could make all the difference. That’s why this week is focused on teen/dating violence. If back then, I would’ve known I could have helped it may have changed things for the better.

Here are a few facts just to get an idea of how serious this. Statistics from loveisnotabuse.com:

• 89% of teens between the ages of 13 and 18 say they have been in dating relationships; forty percent of teenage girls age 14 to 17 report knowing someone their age who has been hit or beaten by a boyfriend. (Children Now/Kaiser Permanente poll, December 1995)
• Nearly 80% of girls who have been physically abused in their intimate relationships continue to date their abuser. (City of New York, Teen Relationship Abuse Fact Sheet, March 1998)
• 1 in 3 teenagers report knowing a friend or peer who has been hit, punched, kicked, slapped, choked or physically hurt by their partner. (Liz Claiborne Inc. study on teen dating abuse conducted by Teenage Research Unlimited, February 2005.)
• Nearly 1 in 5 teenage girls who have been in a relationship said a boyfriend had threatened violence or self-harm if presented with a break-up. (Liz Claiborne Inc. study on teen dating abuse conducted by Teenage Research Unlimited, February 2005.)
• If trapped in an abusive relationship, 73% of teens said they would turn to a friend for help; but only 33% who have been in or known about an abusive relationship said they have told anyone about it. (Liz Claiborne Inc. study on teen dating abuse conducted by Teenage Research Unlimited, February 2005.)

Scary, isn’t it? This is a serious, prevalent problem. It’s often assumed that only married couples or older couples suffer from domestic violence, but this is not the case. So what can you do?

If you think your friend is in an abusive relationship, talk to them. Be prepared for them to deny it, but make sure they know you can be trusted. Recommend they talk to someone like a counselor, teacher, or someone they trust. Give them a hotline they can call if they decide they want help. A good national helpline is loveisrespect.

Love is respect is a National Teen Dating Abuse Helpline sponsored by Liz Claiborne. One of the greatest features of loveisrespect is their live chat. They have peer counselors that will chat with you online 24 hours a day to help you with whatever you’re going through. They also have an 800 number in case the chat is unavailable for some reason.

Think you’re being abused? Chat with the counselors and they’ll help you with what your options are. Worried about your friend? Loveisrespect has tips on how to talk to them. Not sure if your relationship is good for you? Take the quiz at loveisrespect to see if your relationship is healthy. Liz Claiborne also teamed up with dosomething.org to create the program MADE, Mom’s and Dad’s for Education to Stop Teen Dating Abuse. They have a special page dedicated to Teen’s. What can you do to get involved? What do you do if you’re being abused? This page covers all that.

Loveisrespect also has a lot of awesome celebrity involvement; Martina McBride and her daughter have teamed up with loveisrespect to get the word out about teen dating abuse and educate both teens and parents on ways to stay safe. She is currently on tour with Trace Adkins,  calling it the Shine All Night Tour. Also, Lauren Conrad has teamed up with Mark to create the m.powerment by mark campaign, in hopes of educating young women and spreading awareness about the potential for abusive relationships that could change their lives. They created the Have a Heart necklace, available on meetmark.com with proceeds going to the m.powerment fund, trying to put an end to teen domestic violence.

This is such an important cause and one of the most relevant to people in our age group. Statistics show that women ages 16-24 experience the highest rates of dating violence. This includes all of us college students plus our younger sisters, cousins, friends, etc. We can make the change and put an end to this!

If you or a friend is suffering from domestic violence, call the National Teen Dating Violence Hotline at  1-866-331-9474 | 1-866-331-8453 or chat with peer counselors live at loveisrespect.org.

Patrice is an intern with College Lifestyles (TM). She is a journalism major at William Woods University and is a member of Alpha Chi Omega. She is passionate about Domestic Violence Awareness and loves doing her part to spread the word!

“Life is too short. Grudges are a waste of perfect happiness. Laugh when you can and let go of what you can’t change. Love deeply and forgive quickly. Take chances. Give everything and have no regrets. Life’s too short to be unhappy.♥”